Well, I never thought I would say this, but the music of Katawa Shoujo has grown on me, specifically the more poignant pieces. The scenes for which they are composed and selected for has thus far been impeccable; the scenes seemingly giving meaning to the song, and vice versa.
Warning, spoilers ahead. After finishing Rin’s route, reaching the good and the bad ends, the environment in my mind was perhaps much like hers, a jumble of incoherent thoughts and feelings. Sadness, sympathy, curiosity, frustration, confusion, and a host of unnamed sentiments washed over me as Rin’s story unfolded. To be able to elicit this many emotions out of me, deserves applause. The difference between Rin and Shizune, and their routes, is very much night and day respectively. Rin’s story was moody, capricious, and filled with uncertainly, from beginning to end. Shizune’s, aside from Misha’s revelation, was mostly lighthearted and predictable. Shizune herself is like a square piece of glass: transparent, with a clearly defined shape. It takes but a glance to see who she is. While Rin is more like an unknown opaque liquid or gas. She is there, but no one really knows what she is, and its structure alterable, and defies containment.
I was much more absorbed and determined while reading Rin’s route than Shizune’s. Rin’s route was highly philosophical, touching upon themes of self-identity, semantics, definition, art, meaning and purpose of life. These are all profound questions that I believe one eventually ask of themselves at some point of their lives. Rin is a soul all too aware of these questions. Troubled and without answers, she appears as an enigma to those to who try to define her. There is a hurricane raging inside Rin, and her consciousness lies in the eye. Who knows how long poor Rin has suffered, and because of our similar struggles, I deeply sympathize and care for Rin. Unable to express herself cogently, and unsure of what to express, her turmoil remains caged, but little does she know a certain boy named Hisao will stumble upon her eating lunch, and will thenceforth constantly prod at her lock…
Eventually in the good end the storm is released, and she finds and accepts herself. And her final words are these: “What’s the word for when it feels inside your heart that everything in the world is alright?” How many people are already able to say this during their senior high school year?
I think the answer is “peace”, my love. I wonder what that feels like…
